It’s a good day today. I believe this is actually the best day I have had in quite awhile. I am doing my best to embrace the feeling. My struggle has been to stay in the moment and sift through my thoughts, feelings and actions to monitor them to stay on the fresh new positive side of my life I have been fighting to achieve. It is a moment by moment struggle and I am usually exhausted by the end of the day but it is worth it. I am no longer living in that dark, depressed, lonely hole that has tried to destroy me in the past few years. I am living and working every day on myself harder than I ever have in my life.
Good things are happening for me and I need to not allow myself to slip backwards. I want to now move forward and get back on the track of doing instead waiting. I will make it happen instead of wait for it to come.
Don’t get me wrong I am still in the fight of my life but I am blessed with the ability and opportunity to do it.
I am working every day to change my mind to see what a blessing my life is. I have to go through every thought and every reaction to choose life and positive living. I know I am worth it and can appreciate what I have without the hopeless wanting things to get better. My life is worth it. I need to make room for my soul to seek it’s healing and not let the mind bring the past back to get in the way.
My fight and all of my struggles have been worth and continue to show me I am alive and I have the opportunity to only get better.
My Facebook Group the Beading Circle is growing every day and I am wondering if I have what it takes to keep a group like this functioning and growing. I have seen several groups shut down because of negative and hurtful interaction and pray every day that my group will stay the positive, beautiful safe haven it was created to be.
My YouTube channel is growing also and I look forward to making new videos and keep the teaching going. I truly enjoy it. I had the apprehension that I would not be able to continue to keep it going but there is always more I find to express myself with and viewers are giving nothing but positive feedback. The things I am creating are such a blessing to me in so many ways. I don’t know if I know what joy feels like but the good feelings I am experiencing with what I am doing sure feel like it. Joy was just never a word used in my world so I don’t have anything to compare it to. I guess I will just create my own.
I will start to use my organization skills to get a better handle on what is happening. I am working hard to not get overwhelmed and lost in the process of all my endeavors growing and working out. If I get a handle on it I won’t let it become a scary place it will be more of the success I have always dreamed of.
Thanks for stopping by and I hope your next week is everything you deserve.